Although it is looking ever more unlikely, if I were to have a baby, I would be a geriatric mother. This has been the case for a while now. Should I get pregnant, the baby would arrive well beyond my 35th birthday, the grim marker of becoming a ‘geriatric mother’.
No fear though, because the imminent new royal baby will be born to a geriatric mother. I take comfort that even princess Meg gets the ugly title. And she’s not the only one. There are lots of women that I admire, that have had babies after the geriatric label has been applied; Dawn O’Porter, Angel Adoree and lots of my friends in real life. In fact, most of my friends have been over 35, or pretty darn close to it.
While there might be an image of an elderly lady, tottering along behind a pram, this really isn’t the case. Being in your mid-thirties is often a time of stability. Many people will have found a groove in their career, there is disposable income that hadn’t been there before, greens are being intentionally eaten, and often people have started to put down roots, maybe even got on the property ladder. It’s something that The Dinky Blog explains perfectly in their name; double income, no kids yet.
I sometimes ask if we should’ve started trying sooner, not reassure myself, but to check whether we’re both on the same page. We talk about the reasons that we came the decision to have a family when we did. Neither of us were in the right place to have done it any sooner, for lots of reasons. In fact, one of the things that has held the wolves at bay for such a long time, is that we are rarely in the same place at the same time. After a while, people just assumed we had decided on a jet-set life, instead of children. Most people still assume that.
While we might be finding conception a right ol’ ball-ache, I’m glad that I’ll be a parent at this point in my life. I used to congratulate myself that I hadn’t got pregnant as a teenager. Now I’m happy that I didn’t get pregnant in my twenties. That is not to say that some people don’t make great parents when they’re younger than we are now, but I know I couldn’t have done it. It may seem a cliché, but I feel that now is when I will provide the best that is possible for a child. Our relationship is as solid as it’s ever been (if a couple can take on infertility together, they can take anything on!), we’re both in good jobs and we have our lovely little house. More importantly, we’re much better human beings now than we were a decade or more ago.
So kids, we’re ready for you…
P.S. We’ll be celebrating my 35th birthday by going to Fertility Fest. That’s how I know we’re real grown-ups! That, and going to bed at 9.30 with a good book.